You are not your personality

You may ask: If I am not my personality, then who am I?

I’m a Certifed Narrative Enneagram Coach, and one of the things the Enneagram offers us is this realisation: our personality structure is not us. Our personality structure is, partly a defensive strategy, and is the pattern we developed over time from childhood. (Do you know your Enneagram core “type”? If you don’t this is an essential first building block as we need a sense of self, an identity, and to be able to see these things - and that gives us the pathways for growth. If you don’t know, I recommend get in touch with me, and/or go to the Narrative Enneagram’s tour of the nine types). These are the personality structures that have helped us to navigate our lives. Some of these strategies however, if left unquestioned, may hinder our growth through adulthood.

Why would we do this? If you want to become a better leader, you need to understand your drivers, shadows, blindspots. The Enneagram offers a fast track for awareness. It's incredible how quickly my clients suddenly realise patterns that constrain them.

💡 (Note): Do you know your Enneagram core “type”? If you don’t this is an essential first building block as we need a sense of self, an identity, and to be able to see these things that offer us pathways for growth. If you don’t know, I recommend get in touch with me, and/or go to the Narrative Enneagram tour of the nine types (links below).

You may still be wondering, so what is under those personality structures and defensive walls? What can I not yet see? If so, I love your curiosity. A useful lens and resource for your growth journey, if you choose to continue this line of inquiry.

No-one can know what your answers will be, nor what you will discover, but I can share some thoughts about how I might approach this question.

For example: If I am not my personality, then I am someone who is becoming…

◼ less defensive
◼ more intentional
◼ more able to step back and up on the balcony and be in direct awareness of myself and others at the same time
◼ better equipped to recognise my "tribe" (my people) and deepen relationships
◼ and....

It’s slow though. A slow, uneven, scary, backwards, sideways, forwards, up and down process. That’s why it is incredibly helpful to have good company, address good questions, and feel supported in taking steps.

How might you address this question: If your personality is not you (or, not all of you), what can you notice about who you are (already) becoming…?

#personalgrowth #personality